Wednesday, October 31, 2007
I need some breathing space.............
No one can ever know the torment in me.
I choose to ignore, run away and numb myself.
10:51 PM
-Jing Juan-
Friday, October 26, 2007
Haiz.........................................Yesterday ever since organic chem test,i've been emo already. The moment i saw the paper, i started to get panic. The questions aren't easy. My lecturer said he'll posted the ans immediately after the test, so after the test i went to check and to my horror, i score only like 12/30 in section A. Gosh....Section B is also gone-case i think.
Today in organic chem lecture, the moment he step in, his face was like so black! Then he started his scoldings " this is the first time i've marked such a terribly sone test. all the question are so similar to tut and in the 1st page i can see students getting
Zero marks. And the average score is so low. All the mechanism question can proof that you all don't understand anything. Organic chem is not about reading notes pls take pencil and paper and draw the mechanism out! If you read and read you'll still never score, this test is still one level form exam questions and if this is how you're progressing, exam ques is even worst. One girl scored full marks, if she can do it you can do it!"
I was already emo enough, after his lecturings, i felt more emo, i think i may scored badly. I started thinking about many things. Is chem really what i want? Why cant i do well? Is uni suitable for me? I'm not gd in phys and haven't touch them since olevels, i've nv go tru JC i don have Alevels maths background and poly maths is like chicken feet and now i'm not gd in chem, i'm only left with bio chem and i'm only an average B student in that module. Look i don even have some strong modules on hands, how am i going to survive? I've always wanted to work in labs and do research esp food stuffs and this course is the closest to food degree and moreover i can also venture into drugs industry.
But i'm really very stress, this is the 1st time i study till so pek chek. It seems that i';ve lose the motivation in me. It's as if that i got into uni already and i start to become slack. Or am i really not built for uni studies? I dreading seeing that i still have 3.5 years more to go. I don know is i can survive till then. I've consider quitting sch and work then reapply NUS next yr or i may just go Aus for food degree. Haiz. But this is so unilike me, i don really like giving up so easily. But it's just so stress and torturing.
Haiz....................i'm in emo state now, don come and tok to me.
Haiz................... sobs =(
10:35 PM
-Jing Juan-
Sunday, October 07, 2007
Dear friends thanks for coming to my party to share this special day with me.
Despite the fact that i'm another year older, i've enjoyed myself to the uttermost yesterday. =)
Thanks for all the pressies!!
11:12 PM
-Jing Juan-
