Saturday, May 26, 2007
I reached home at 3pm yesterday!! Still feel kind of sleepy and restless now. Snore* Yesterday time passes super slow at work, initially we planned to go Minds or some chill out places even before Melv went to Shanghai but always didn't manage to go in the end. Yesterday's outing was rather last minute, Candice suddenly came and looked for us mentioning that she's not going for her midnight shopping already and since Melv,TH, Eddie and me have nothing on so we decided to go Minds! Bascially the last half hour of the day before work ends, we just manage to plan the night activities.
Melv, TH Mitch and i went for dinner first at Wisma Food Republic first while Cand meet her frinds for dinner and Eddie who's driving met us abit later. We shopped around for awhile before meeting up with the rest to go Minds at boat quay. I've never been to Minds before, so as compared it to Settlers, i think Minds in terms of comfort is better. Haha. Anyway it was fun la playing games with with my colleagues, all of the same age. Though some of the games are rather chim, i think it's interesting.
After Minds, we still went Middle Road for prata thus that's how i ended so late home yesterday. Was really concussed loh ZzzzZzzzzzzzzzz. Hee... I've got a busy weekend ahead, BBQ today and Church lunch tml and Poly gathering tml night. Hazz.. so busy and i'm jus gota put on weight after eating so much!!!!
I've decided to go NTU. My lecturers said NTU treat poly students better, NUS are abit biased especially to Poly students, thus in terms of environment, NTU is better.
12:07 PM
-Jing Juan-
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Yea finally now I'm a diploma graduate!! I guess every 2007 graduads have been waiting for this day to come. The hard work in 3 years of poly life doesn't come easy well for CLS students only. Started my day early, cause i've to find means to conceal my 2 big pimple!! And i think i did manage to conceal it well. I guess? Anyway, took cab to school with my mum n grandma, got abit of jam somewhere in the highway so ended abit late. When i was there, many graduads had already put on their gown n everything, present themselves in their best look n proceed into the convention centre. Just nice happened to meet my friends along the way too so after wearing the gown, we went in together. My seat was far towards the back, well "Tan" ma anyway so did not really see my classmates other than Charles. Well at least the girl beside me was my year one friend so there's companion. Haha otherwise sit there quiet all the way like so weird.
This years' guest speak is Dr Lisa Ng, former SP student now working in Genome Institude don't know what A* thingy, doing research in biological field. Personally i don't think she's a good speaker, because 99% of the time she stare at her paper n not at the audience -.-" So it's like so not professional then her speech is like boring!! She spend 40% of her time talking about some research thingy tht's she's doing, the SARS thing, pictures of the virus. -.-" What does this has to do with our future path after SP. I remember i've been to the past year graduation ceremony before n that year the speak was really good. Anyway i wasn't listening to her lah was talking with my friend haha. Finally is the commencement of the ceremony, haiz it's so long before it reaches me. I was quite nervous la, haha afraid that i may fall/slip or whatever thing, it will be damn "pai sei" loh. Lol.
The first thing when all of us manage to squeeze out from the centre was to take photos!! Hahaz, spend 95% of the time taking photos. One thing that i'm still "bu shuang" now is. How can a graduad didn't manage to eat the buffet!!!!! Before photo taking i wanted to grad some food n all the trays of buffet food were gone!!!! @#!@#$#%$#@ How can!! -.-" I never eat loh!! Argh!! Ended up eating foodcourt food. Haha what a waste.
Anyway took plenty of photos, enjoy viewing. Pls don't comment on my pimple!
10:16 PM
-Jing Juan-
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Tml is my big day!!! Heee not wedding la -.-" it's my poly graduation day! Whoa 3 years of my life spent in SP. Really miss school, miss the young adult life, er...though uni life is also consider young adult, i still miss times i spent with my fellow poly friends. Haven't really seen some of them ever since my last paper. Tml is the day!! Lots of photo taking, catching up session, meeting lecturers n of cos buffet. Heee!
Haiz these few days i've been supper supper pissed. I've got 2 big pimples on my cheek each on one to even out, wah thanks to myself ya for poping out the pimples. Sickening!! Many of my friends suggested concealer!! Yes so tml i'm going to apply super thick make-up. Zzzz Hee..
Anyway i prepared all the stuffs already, ironed my shirt, skirt as well as the graduation gown.
Jealousy is women's most active emotion~
10:08 PM
-Jing Juan-
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
I know I've been hiding, moving backwards, not knowing where I'm going. Deep inside me I know something is wrong, be it spritually, emotionally or physically. Everything is not right. I also know that when anything in my life crops up, the first thing that is deeply affected is my spiritual life. I know it has been greatly affected. Remember what i always remind myself of 1 John 2:15 Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world the love of Father is not in him. I knew of this day coming even before my exams started, i know once i graduated, when i look for jobs, when i don't have to commit to studies, with more time, i will tend to find enjoyment, leisure or entertainment. With my materialistic nature, i know i will move away, i see the danger coming. Why despite me knowing it, i am still sinking in? I seriously don't like commitments, the more responsibility i have i tend to move back more. Can i have some space? Some space to do things i like? Nobody says i cant, the choice is in me. So which means i can choose to sink deeper? But thanks to someone who speak also some sense to me.
I never thought the person can be you, it's not like i never confided in you before, i always do in the past. But in the past you were like me as well, refusing to hear whatever spiritual things i'm trying to tell you. I never expect now, it's your turn to say me. Thanks for letting me know that I've once again lose this focus and gota find back. I just find that those words that came out of your mouth had greater impact than any other person, because you once rejected them and now you've changed. It's really different to have somebody to share some spiritual stuffs, it's completely different from other people. I'm also quite glad that you finally found the answer you've been searching for but remember you haven't really share out your stuffs to others. Just hope that you will remember what you saw in that posting, because that's what i always whated to tell you but you just don't seem to get it. Now that you know, in future do serve the person you cherish most. I'm just glad enough to know that i'm still being remembered in just that one corner. Is it because i'm too used to you, you just seem to know what i am thinking. You'll know what i'm troubled with. You know too well about me no matter how i twist n turn. Anyway, still thanks for picking the ill side of me and really allow me to give it a thought.
Am i afraid of history repeating itself? Lack of confidence? No faith or whatever. I think i just have to let go. I'm just covering myself. Trying to do some stupid things to protect myself or even thinking of doing whatever others had done to me to others, just to make myself feel good. The thought of wanting to anything that once someone did to me to others was already wrong. So what if right now i make others miserable and i'm happy. I think this is not fair to anybody, they just don't deserve the treatment that i once had. I think i should really take away that " i don't give a damn to guys attitude". I'm only mad about what people did to me that i want to put it to other people. So right now i just want to be true, don't wish to hide anymore. Just want to spend time together with myself, discovering more of myself for right now.
5:47 PM
-Jing Juan-
