Thursday, July 31, 2003
Skipped school for two days as i just did not have the mood to go. However, i stayed at home to do my revision, at least i did not waste time. Called a long lost friend on Tuesday. Happened to find his contact number on Sunday. I was flipping over some old notebook and i found his number. Suddenly had the urge to call him so i called. I could not get him, his line was either engaged or he was not in. Erm...... then i tried on tuesday and i said if i could not get him again i shall not call again. UgH! i could not find him too. I never gave up! Tried to call again and finally i reached him. So i asked how was he doing now and how was his Os. Before he told me, i tried to guess, JC?? JJC?? Must be right? He said no. ErM... i asked why! He is very bright and i thought he should be in JC now. However, no. We have the same R4 points and he is now studying in SP, some ULU course. Erm.... i asked why???? His reply was "maybe play too much basketball". Erm... haiz* it's a waste i thought.
Why all my friends are in SP. Haiz* another year more to go! We hung up soon and i guess maybe the next time we can get to chat again is four months later. Erm...... he's really a long lost friend, i knew him since secondary two. Only got to catch up him on Tuesday, long right????
~YoU MaY oNlY Be OnE PeRsOn To ThE WoRlD~
~BuT YoU MaY AlSo Be ThE WoRlD To OnE PeRsOn~
8:31 PM
-Jing Juan-
Monday, July 28, 2003
Returned from school two hours ago, plonked my things down and went to see if anyone sms me. I saw this sms and i was so outraged and fuming with anger!!!!!! I had been thinking about this incident since i hung up the phone call yesterday. First question that came to my mind was how could he do that!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was eating dinner too but i never continued upon receiving that call as it spoiled my appetite!!!!! It was just a SMS and it brought me so much troubles. I was really angry even during the long journey to school. My expression was horrible and i glared hard at anyone who looked at me so as to express my wrath!!!! I hate this world!!!!!! I hate my life!!!!!!! So miserable!!!!!!! As i was walking, i kept saying "I HATE THIS WORLD"!!!!!!!!!
Those words were so sensitive and anyone who heard them would definitely feel terrible!!!!! How can i not take it to heart?????? You think it's so easy to forget or treat it as nothing had happened??????? NO!!!! Somehow i was wrong too, if i know it will turn out like this, i will never send that SMS. I thought it was just a SMS but................haiZzzZ*
Four more days to Saturday, how i wish i can find some excuse not to go........ I am not suppose to lie which means i must go and face them!!! Haiz* someone please ask me out on Sat.
3:46 PM
-Jing Juan-
Sunday, July 27, 2003
Just got home, i am restless now! That girl pulled me to shop with her all the way from IMM to JP!!! I just wanted to return my books, in the end i had to accompany her to walk around. * SiAnZ*
Went to UBin yesterday, wOoOoO it was so fun but tired too. Cycled for half a day, hopefully i can lose a KG, keke* We had a fun time and got to know some new friends as well. Lots of things had happened and i laughed alot during the trip.
Dinner was included, those rice in each packet was so much that none of us could finish it all. Fresh coconuts were served, the juice was sweet. Everything turned out pleasant and the weather was fine too. On our way home all of us saw fireworks. Sometimes life is so busy, everyone of us has so much to do that we may not have time to stop and take a deep breathe. We should always take a break once in a while to enjoy peacefully otherwise one may be stressed up. I have so many white hair nowadays, guess i am getting old or maybe too stress up in my studies.
I turned in after watching the channel U's show, i was so tired, extremely tired!!!!! HeEz*
LiFe Is LiKe CyClInG, AlWaYs At ThE FaStEsT SpEeD, AlWaYs AiMiNg FoR ThE BETtEr, AlWaYs ReAcHiNg FoR DeStInAtIoN.
DiD OnE EvEr ThInK Of StOpPInG AnD AlLoWInG OtHeRs To OvErTaKe YoU Or SlOwInG DoWn To TaKe A BrEaK?
OnLy WhEn OnE LoSe HiS BaLaNcE, ThAt Is WhEn HiS JoUrNeY CoMe To A StOp.
5:46 PM
-Jing Juan-
Saturday, July 26, 2003
Erm...I learnt a idiom today, "pot calling the kettle black". I found it very funny, i kept laughing when i learnt this idiom.
The pot itself is black still called the kettle black, haha stupid pot...It reminded myself that no one is perfect and one must never pin point at others as you may not realise that you are the same just like that person u pin pointed.
Invited so many friends for tomorrow's activity but none of them wanted to go. Either they have reports to do or they are busy for other stuffs. Even XJ can't make it, hope the trip is not wasted, no friends mean it is going to be meaningless.
Today i spent some time doing my devotion and i learnt alot from it.
Hebrews 13:14 For this world is not our home, we are looking forward to our city in heaven, which is yet to come.
John 12:25 those who love their life in this world will lose it. Those who despise their life in this world will keep it for eternal life.
It reminded me again not to take all earthly things to heart, is it so important that we cannot let it go? Sometimes try to let go of them, for things which are meant for you they will always be yours however things which are not meant for you no matter how hard you catch they will still vanished. Always be satisfied and must not take things for granted.
Nothing is more important than that particular "gift". Chapter 10:35 do not throw away this confident trust in the Lord, no matter what happenes. Remember the great reward it brings you! Sometimes there will be problems and trials but He keep assuring me; Psalm 55:22 Give your burdens to the Lord, and He will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall. Psalm 49:5 There is no need to fear when times of trouble come. "John 16"33 Here on earth you will have many trails and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world". YeAh!
Once i found a phrase very interesting, i was wondering if it is in the bible or i found it at other books.
Worry says " God doesn't care and He wont do anything"
Faith says " God does care and He and I will work it out together"
God
Grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change...
The courage to change the things i can...
And the wisdom to know the difference...
This quote is from D, he claimed that i must give him a credit by puting his name. HaHa*
~ LoVe Is LiKe FaLlInG InTo A HoLe, EaSy To FaLl In HaRd To GeT OuT -- Darryl ~
~ CoUnT YoUr BlEsSiNg NoT YoUr WoRrIeS ~
12:15 AM
-Jing Juan-
Sunday, July 20, 2003
Went to popular after service, along the way i was in a train. I was so engrossed in my reader's digest and it kept me busy throughout. Finally found my TYS, stupid teacher told me that book was not going to be published anymore, almost scared me. It was a good TYS among all those but i searched everywhere and couldn't find it. Thank God i found it today, otherwise my grandma would definitely accuse me of spending her money on unwise stuffs.
As i was surfing this site http://www.book4u.com.tw, i found all these Kenny's stuff. They are so cute, all these stationeries can only be found in TW, why can't i find them in Singapore? I remembered on Tue while watching "Wo Cai", i saw a guy wearing a T-shirt with Kenny on it. That Kenny was not dressed in his usual orange outfit but a blue one instead. Where can i find a Kenny wearing blue outfit?? In TW??Haiz*
~LoVe Is LiKe FaLlIng InTo A DiTcH sO EaSiLy YeT So DeEp~
10:21 PM
-Jing Juan-
Saturday, July 19, 2003
YOUR CROSS
Whatever your cross
Whatever your pain
There will always be sunshine
After the rain
Perhaps you may stumble
Perhaps even fall
But God's always there
To help you through it all
11:12 PM
-Jing Juan-
Friday, July 18, 2003
I begged my grandmother to wake me up this morning, i claimed that i would definitely wake up to go for a jog and headed for school. Haha* 7am she woke me up, asking me to jog with her but i was unwillingly to get out of my bed, i denied and back out at the last minute and asked her to wake me up at 8am instead. Allowing me to have another hour of sleep before waking up for school. A hour is just like a minute, it flew so fast like a flash, i was too unwilling to wake up and i told my grandma " no school today la" and i went back to sleep till 10 plus.
Stayed at home the whole day, basically rotting, did a composition in the morning. I put in much effort to accomplish it, hope i will not see too much red markings on my paper next week. Revised abit on physics, seems like i can cope now. Happy to say that i finish the whole Emaths ten year series and i am going to buy another one tomorrow. I set a target for myself to accomplish either to complete the TYS 2 times or 3 times. Planning to buy some chinese novels, i will not read it now but after my examinations, my aim is to improve English and not Chinese language. Those books are cheap and that is why i want to purchase them.
Many things happened, i am not going to elaborate it. Trying to take things easlier, i am sure God will lead me out of that "jungle". Tomorrow is CG time, yeah*.
~Christ is the ladder by which we ascend to God the Father ~
11:27 PM
-Jing Juan-
Saturday, July 12, 2003
A week had past, a very dull week, glad that weekends are here again. Nothing interesting happened the previous four days, life is as normal and usual for me. Goes to school in the morning and revising when i reach home. But what can i do instead of studying, am i studying for the sake of passing or studying because i want to know more and deeper into that topic so that it will do me do when i get into poly??? Life's getting bore for me nowadays. Always facing those books, i keep telling myself to enjoy studying and not forcing myself to study but why can't i do that? I really dislike Mole Concept, it is my worst topic of the whole chemistry, now i am struggling to get it through. I am determine to master it but why can't i do it? I hate Electricity too but somehow i managed it this week by putting real effort trying to figure out all those stuffs. PhEw*
Is life going to be like this for me?Why am i in such situation? Why i land myself in this state? Study everyday, doing those stuffs again and again, looks like i am very hardworking however, no. Nowadays i am realy slack, whenever i think of studying i feel like sleeping, what is going wrong with myself? Fate changes everything, it is true indeed it change my life. I hate my school, a bloody lousy school, never ever recommend my friend or anyone there. Those teachers are like shit, "those" students are worst, i know i do not have the right to say that they are worst but it is true. Can they be more mature and civilised? Those guys are crazy, inmature idiots, some had already served their NS others are just like me O graduates, cany they behave well????? They are acting like idiots in the class, running and screaming away like mad dogs. Slamming and knocking the door, making so much noise. In the middle of lesson, they rushed out of the class, screaming at the pathway. Stupid right??? They are not 13 or 14 year old but adolscents, still behaving like crazy idiots. Listening to teachno in the classroom, blasting the music away, are they deaf or what? Make sure their ear drums go burst!! If they are there to listen to techno, playing around i rather they stay at home and stop disturbing others! Shouting and making those jeering sounds, if they are good enough don't waste their parents money!! The fees are so expensive yet they are wasting them!! A bunch of idiots, that particular guy, whenever i see his face i really feel like punching him! Why must he always on the techno untill the fullest volume and must he always sit near to me disturbing me??????Today i really had the urge of standing up and giving him a taste of my temper or i will just throw the chair at him!! However if i do that, i will not be typing my blog now. The only thing i can do is to stare hard at him whenever he walk pass me. I hate this kind of class, it is not like my former class where we were united and worked hard towards our goals and dreams. Let love be the root and foundation of your life, i saw this phrase while reading a book, bullshit! If God put this kind of people in my life, if they are my friends? You want me to love or clickwell with them, "sorry wrong number" you have got the wrong person, i am not going to submit to that!!! However, i know sooner or later God will mould me or anyone else into that kind of person. Three months and three quarter days to go and i will never ever want to see them again!
During dinner, my uncle told me that his friend's wife passed away, the lady was young and things just happened unexpectedly. He told me not to procrastinate if there is something i want to accomplish, go ahead and do it as one may not know what will happen the next day. Life is short if you never cherish it everything will be gone, time and tide wait for no man. Upon hearing his words, i pondered for some time before munching again, this is my second chance and i am not going to give it away again!
~Fate changes everything~
12:11 AM
-Jing Juan-
Sunday, July 06, 2003
HAI* Was late for service today, said something wrong yesterday and never expect i would experienced it today. Woke up at 9am, which was very late, normally i have to get up by 8am. At 9am, i will reach the JE station but today i was still at home. Started jumping around and panicking, i did not want to miss the morning service as i had to meet my friend in the afternoon. Thankfully my uncle came to my house, i rushed and got ready after 10mins and managed to persuade him to drive me the Bukit Batok. PhEw! I always wake up on time but today............ what goes round, come round.... next time i should keep my mouth shut!
Went to meet my friend and her boyfriend, i really regretted, i would rather go to afternoon service if i knew this would happen. Suppose to meet up with them for a drink or something else, ended up they brought their boyfriends along. Boring! Worst they kept walking with their BF leaving me behind or walking ahead of them! In the end i had to walk around orchard alone, shoped alone! It's okay they left me alone, i did not mind, but must they kept holding hands like showing off that they were attached! *BlIsH* myself! I was so tired and restless in the end, that i went home before another friend came. My friend was bringing her BF too, so sickening i rather go home and take a nap. Promise myself i will never ever go out with couples.
My uncle scolded and encourgaed me tonight. He said so much things that woke me up, i really cant managed my time, i kept doing maths and neglect my english again. Said that i have no determination never really put effort into my studies. But this is not true, if i do not have determination i will give up long ago, i hate to stand up, really hated! Standing up after you had failed is the most terrible thing in this whole world. Why of all the people i have to go through all these?????????? WHY! I hate this word " WHY" there's so many unexplainable things in this world, yet i am born in it. However, what D said was true, God never create me in this world to go to hell, there must be soemthing He wanted to do in my life so that next time i can encourgage others too. But i am still very sad now.
11:17 PM
-Jing Juan-
Saturday, July 05, 2003
HeHe* Happy day! I got to eat "LAYS" today, wah* coolz hor! LaLaLa~~~~ nothing really much to blog today, brought 2 friends to cell group, overall it turned out alright for them. No expression, maybe they don't expressed it out? Not that sure, but i know that they are very open......yup*
My grandparents went to a wedding buffet at a church, the newly couple is my distant relative, i did not go. My distant cousin went, did not know she went, if not i will go to the wedding too. Have not seen her for a year, wondering how's she doing now at her private school. I had lost her HP number otherwise i will call and ask her out. Last time our relationship was very close, went out every public holiday but due to some incidents we had not contacted now. My grandparents told me that the food they prepared was very delicious! If i knew it earlier maybe i will attend the wedding hehe*
Found out something nice from the invitation card.
Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all" Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. Give her the reward she has earned and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
11:31 PM
Today is Friday...soon it will be Saturday. Yesterday i was almost late for school, woke up at 10 plus plus, i took that usual bus 334. I was pondering over some stuffs, all the way from my house to the interchange. As i was thinking then i realised i had missed my bus-stop and sat all the way to interchange and that would make me walk all the way back to my school which was very "FAR" haiz* if i knew i would stop thinking. While walking i saw so many students trying to get people to donate money, they were form SP as they were wearing the school's t-shirt. Haha* i forgot to bring my wallet so i avoided them, then as i was walking to the road i saw a girl standing there alone holding that tin. *Oh No*....... i don't think i can avoid this time! And worst i cant even see her face, i never wear my spectacles, but when i walked nearer i found out that that girl is my friend. We chatted and i told her i really did not bring out my wallet out so i was really broke at that moment if not i would definitely donate. Then asked how and what she is doing at the moment, she was my sec 2 friend though everytime see her in MSN but i never talk to her.
Today's weather was so cooling, rained for the whole day till now it is still raining.I hate to wear that pair of slippers on raining day, it will make me look like a duck when i walk. The bottom of the slippers had worn out so it is rather slippery for me, if i never walk properly i will definitely had a fall. So i had to walk like a duck to prevent me from slipping which is very ugly. Something terrible happened today, really horrible, i don't wish to talk about it anymore. It was so "kong bu" when i think of it i wanted to vomit, bad experience, yucks horrible!!!!!!!!
Yeah* Finished my Units, today's the last day of Unit 5, finally, now can look at comics!
~Kindness is a language that the blind can see, the dumb can speak, and the deaf can hear and understand~
~I don't know what is love but if you love me, love is like heaven~
~Wo bu dong she me jiao ai, dan shi ru guo ni ai wo, ai jiu xiang tien tang~
12:08 AM
-Jing Juan-
Thursday, July 03, 2003
YaY.... first time eating at a japanese outlet in Singapore, rather fun and enjoying. A few new friends turned up this evening, including yf really shock she agreed when i ask her, this time no need to persuad maybe it's because we are eating japanese food. ErmZ* Met up quite early as i was really blurr and did not know which building the sushi outlet was located. It's OUB or UOB.. erm.. which one seems confusing, walked all over the place looking for it, its really stupid...
Finally found it, at last, then we settled down to eat, that time was around 5 plus we ate so much that around 6 plus we cant take it anymore. That time i was really full, so bloated that i could hardly breathe. However, i still managed to eat more so that the buffet would be not be wasted,hehe* Till now i was still bloated, waiting for the rice to digest before i go to sleep. Otherwise i will gain another kg the next few days, no* i must go jogging tomorrow! Went jogging yesterday, then met one young boy at the void deck, he suddenly approached me. I was wondering what he wanted to do or asked, then he asked if i had time to spared, i replied "ya". And he asked me a very stupid question, quite a sensitive one. He asked "er..what is puberty", HUH! i looked at him, not look is like stared. Because to me that is a very sensitive question, i thought he wanted to asked me some dirty things as he looked rather like a pervert although he is very young. Then before i replied him i asked for his age, he's only 13 but he looked like primary 5 or 6. He is really short, then i was so shocked that i gave him a very stupid answer, guessed he also could not understand. haha* i told him it's something like growing up...meaning example, your voice will break... stupid...crap... After that i went to jog, managed to run two pathway, then i climbed up the stairs up and down for 3 times. When i woke up this morning, my whole body was aching, my back really hurts and especially my thighs and abdominal...now i can still feel the pain, when i sneeze or laugh this morning oh no* it's really painful.. maybe it's because i never exercise for almost 2 months. Haiz*
Just now ehn i was doing my devotional i found something interesting, i found out i could also have one spiritual diary to note down all my thoughts and meaningful bible verses. Erm... never think of that before maybe i can try it tomorrow. Started the prayer thingy, wah.. so much to pray... ermz... found someting useful too. Everytime most of us will pray out all the things we want or need to Lord without giving Him back what we gain. YupZ how can i contribute the things i prayed back to God, maybe by glorifying Him?? Now i will have to spend at least a hour, reading God's word and pray. There is so much to read, so much to explore, no one will ever stop exploring His words. =)
12:23 AM
-Jing Juan-
